Every year, I plan to treat the Halloween candy aisles at Kroger and WalMart with the same caution I would an Afghan mine field. But somewhere around the third week of September, the plan always fails when I innocently decide to browse through the vast cornucopia of sweets to check prices. Inflation, I justify, affects everything and I should go ahead and plan my purchases now. So there'll be no surprises come Halloween week.
In Walmart, after passing by the huge cardboard witch's house, that siren of cavities which lures unsuspecting shoppers into it's deadly grasp, I stop the buggy, make a calculated u-turn, and pull into the forbidden aisle. "What are you doing, mom? I thought we were staying away from the candy," asks my son, Andrew, excited, but a little frightened by the zombie-like stare that's taken over my eyes. "I'm no longer in control, Son. I'm in the grips of a power greater than myself. A power that goes by the name of Hershey. There's no turning back now. "
In front of my eyes was a swirl of kit kats, hershey bars, snickers, nerds, m&m's, runts, goobers, milk duds, lollipops, twizzlers, skittles. The list goes on.
To be honest I don't remember much of anything after that. But I'm glad I stocked up on all this candy so early. I'm quite sure there'll be plenty left for trick-or-treaters. I'll just set aside these 18 bags of Reese's to snack on in the meantime.
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